I Just Got “Tagged” For the First Time!

My friend, Allison aka Fancy, tagged me! So, here goes:

8 Things I am Passionate About (in no particular order):
Michael
Abby
Jesus
Politics
CVS/ECBs/Coupons (lol)
Special Needs Kids
Ministry to Special Needs Families
Generosity - to put it better, working on being a generous person.

8 Books I Have Read and Enjoyed:
Redeeming Love
If You Lived Here
Eat, Pray, Love
Memoirs of a Geisha
The Tipping Point
The Saturday Wife
Strangers and Neighbors: What I Have Learned About Christianity by Living Among Orthodox Jews
The Omnivore’s Dilemma

8 Words/Phrases I Say Often:
I love you!
Has Abby had her meds?
Let’s change your diaper.
What do you want for dinner?
Why did this happen?
I’m just going to be on the computer for a couple of minutes.
What time do you have to leave?
Can we pick up the house for 10 minutes?

8 Things I Want to do Before I Die… (In no particular order):
Go on a “real” honeymoon.
See Abby be completely normal. (Really, nothing else matters)
Welcome more children into our home.
Be a grandmother
Buy my husband a classic sports car.
Find a job (outside of being a mom) that I really love.
Become physically fit.

8 Things I Learned This Past Year:
Be honest about what you’re going through. God can use transparency in ways you can never imagine.
Being hurt doesn’t excuse everything.
Despite it all, life is really good.
My husband is a gem. (I knew this, but I know it better now.)
Sometimes, you just have to follow your gut.
Never, ever quit trying to get docs to listen to you.
Houston just might be the nicest city on earth.

Eight People I want to Tag:
Stephanie
Jenn
Liz
Heather
Amanda
Angie
Carrie
Allison

Just Because I Love This Song.

Edit: Because I neglected to give the details on this song and Steph needs them (LOL) it’s Brooke Fraser and the title is “Shadowfeet”. But, I’m warning you, once you start listening to her songs, you can’t stop. They are ALL awesome!

Everyday Life - Swimming

Ok, this is going to be super duper quick but I took some pics this weekend and I haven’t updated in awhile. SO…here are some pics. I’ll blog again soon! I’ve had house guests all summer but that is winding down so I’ll have more time!

Abby and her Daddy LOVE to swim in the pool. And, it is so good for Abby. Look how well she holds her head up in the water!

Everyday Life - Abby at the Astros.

We went to a game at Minute Maid while Michael was on vacation.
The caption of this pic could be, “Mom, our team isn’t very good.” LOL

Everyday Life - Christy and Daniel

My sister and her husband are in town and today, we visited the Water Wall. I shot this picture of the two of them. This pose was their idea and it was so much better than my pose. LOL If I had it to do over, I would have flipped us all around so that the water wall and more trees were behind them, instead of the street. But, there were people taking quinceara pictures so I chose this instead. Oh, and I shouldn’t have cropped out Daniel’s feet. LOL Still learning!

Here’s another play, more muted. And, not cropped at all. LOL I do like these colors a little better though. I’m still trying to find my style.

It’s The Little Things. :)

I had to pick up a few things at Kroger this morning. They are remodeling my Kroger so things are a bit of a mess but when I walked through the doors, the most beautiful site met my eyes.

Starbucks.

Yes, soon, I will be able to sip a caramel frappucinno while grocery gaming. That’s a happy thing!

The Kankelfam is very busy with KSBJ’s Shareathon this week! Thank you so much to all of you who listen and/or support KSBJ financially. We feel like all of the KSBJ “family” is our family too.

Blessings!

The Gratitude Campaign

This is such a great idea!

The Gratitude Campaign

Abby’s Last Day of School

These are a little late being posted but here are two pictures from Abby’s last day of school.

In the first, she’s checking out her preschool diploma and in the second, you can see our beloved Mrs. Tucker. Abby LOVES Mrs. Tucker and so do we!

How Do I Get There From Here?

I’ve been asking myself that question over and over again.

I don’t know what to do now.

It’s not really about the miscarriage. While it is disappointing, it isn’t a major tragedy in my life. That isn’t to say that it isn’t devastating to some, but I have been dealing with it pretty well.

But, Abby’s condition has been a major tragedy in my life. And, I guess the miscarriage has just made me feel even more “picked on”.

Last night, I read Angie Smith’s blog post about the threshing floor. It was so moving and so spiritually insightful. She is amazing.

I’m not like her. I’m not amazing. I haven’t turned to God and built an altar on my threshing floor. I don’t. even. want. to. I’m tired of being sifted.

So, how do I get there from here?

How do I get to the place where I’m no longer so angry about what has happened to my daughter? I never pray for anything for myself. All my prayers are for her, and recently, for the safety and health of my unborn child.

I want my prayers to be answered and I want to feel close to Him. But, I don’t know how to get there from here.

My heart is going to have to change and it is going to take work. I’m not sure how to accomplish it but I’m going to have to trust God that He will help me. Right now, I’m choosing to trust in Him even though everything within me tells me I shouldn’t.

Is this what it is all about? Trusting Him despite all of your circumstances?

I think it is.

I don’t like it. But, I think it is.

Like Angie said in her post, if your sacrifice doesn’t cost you something, it doesn’t mean much. I think I’ve been holding on to my hurt and indignation and wrapping it around me like a security blanket. To sacrifice that will cost me something. He says he’ll give us beauty in return for our ashes, comfort in return for our tears. I never realized, until now, that those ashes and tears would be my sacrifice to Him.

This Week’s Top 5

Ok, after the week I’ve had this seems stupid. But, I’m going to try it anyway.

1. I got horrible news but somehow, through it, I managed to maintain a good attitude for most of each day. I kept plugging away.

2. I kept my house clean!

3. I went grocery gaming for the first time in ages. I saved 50%.

4. I decided to start doing Weight Watchers again and I worked out twice.

5. Once again, I wrestled with God, questioned everything and threatened to just quit. But, I’m still here and I will be ok. I’m broken, spent and angry. But, I will be ok. I’m tired of the struggle. But, somehow, I will keep going. I’m not sure how to get there from here. I’m going to try anyway.

And for that, I hold my head high.